Dinosnores

You’re probably thinking, “Hey man, why haven’t you said anything funny lately?” It’s because I have a two-month old baby, and I don’t know if you have a two-month old baby, but here’s what trying to write funny things with a two-month old baby is like:

Two dogs walk into a bar and buy a beer. fin

Maybe it would be funny if you saw two dogs drinking out of the same beer glass, I don’t know. I’m not sure I’m qualified to make that call. Either way, my new father brain can no longer distinguish between funny and not, and the warring sides have agreed to make everything seem chuckle worthy.

This can happen, too:

Two dogs do something and…

I start with a good idea (who doesn’t like dogs, right?) and then quickly fall apart. Focus is at a premium and I now have five unfinished posts. Bluh.

So what have I been doing with my time, you may ask? Well, watching dinosaur documentaries mostly. I don’t feel that I need to explain why, if you don’t get it, maybe you’re the weird one. Having now watched most of the dinosaur documentaries that Netflix has to offer, I have something to report.


 The Walking with Dinosaurs series is from 2000 and it still holds up. Some of the CGI is a little goofy, but I’ve seen a lot worse in more current movies. Also, they use a lot of puppets and robots and every time I see one of those, I think about how lucky the S.O.B. operating the puppet/robot is and how fast I would murder that person if it meant I got that person’s job.

The 2012 release of Dinotasia, however, is an utterly lame offering. Instead of showing you what science has discovered (you know, like a documentary) Werner Herzog provides narration that walks the line between absurd and hilarious as he throws out lines about dinosaurs being our actors on the stage of life and death in a thick German accent. You could watch the whole movie, but save yourself some time and watch this instead.

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